Life is all about risks.

At that exact moment, when my pulse is flat-lined, while my heart beats fast,
as I'm running into you.
You just stand there, unaware of what I'm about to do, maybe I´ll kiss you, hug you, maybe I'll push you away, maybe a simple kiss on the cheek, on the neck, anywhere. anytime. everywhere. 


When she's close by, the air around us is full of tension, unlike when it's only the two of us, when we are together.


My heart is aching as I'm pondering about what I should do. What to tell you, what to do. I know what I want, I know what I want this to be like. What I don´t know is what to say, what is best.

Sometimes I just want to turn around and walk away, walk and think until I figure out what to do, walk until the night falls down on me, until the skies turn gray and it starts to rain, until the rain gets me soaked, while I tuck out my tongue so I can feel the water drops, until I listen to myself, not what I should but what I actually want. Jelousy and karma, both bitches I try to push away, but in fact, they are already there.

I really want to forget, to trust you, not to be afraid, sadly, I can´t do this all by myself.

The truth is, we have so much more to learn, maybe together, maybe now or maybe later. Patience. Only time will tell.

It´s amazing, this is amazing. How I feel, how my heart somehow skips a beat. When words are not needed anymore, the way I´m never uncomfortable, the way I worry, the way I care.

I just want to hug you and watch you smile, I want to see you motivated and enjoying life, becoming a better person and while you do it, I will too, as watching you grow will make me grow too.

I´m sure that we're gonna fight, we're gonna scream and we'll get mad, but these wont´t ever change the way I feel about you, never forget that.

I just don´t want any more broken promises or lies, those, make everything fall apart, everytime.

However, I will keep my promise, you'll see, even if we dont talk by then, that day, I will take the first step.

I´m wondering how we got into this and I still can´t believe what we've become in so little time. All I know is that I care, about you, about us.

Like we said countless times, this is probably not going to work out, one way or another, I´m pushing these ideas to the back of my mind, so I can think straight once again, and so then I can aknowledge it and say, life is all about risks. 

I want you, that´s all I know, I want us.

Finally, like one of my girlfriends said a couple of days ago. In the end, the crystal girl is falling for the badass indie gal. Let´s just hope, this time he´ll not let her fall.   A little ironic, isn't it?

As we all know, there are a couple of crystal pieces missing, they got lost with every crash, with every fall. Invisible scars, which remind us where we've been and what we've gone through. Those, remind us everyday why we are the way we are. They remind us who we are, but they must never dictate where we're going.